Well, I glimpsed a mere smidgin of my mortality tonight.....and ladies and gentlemen..... it wasn't pretty. It has been a hectic day at work.....akin to juggling cats while balancing a running chainsaw on the end of my nose with both hands tied behind my back while wearing rollerskates. It was a hectic day. And a gloomy day. It has rained, misted, sleeted, slushed, and was otherwise blustery, raw, and miserably cold. And then I came home. To an empty house. My husband is in sunny Florida this week for work and I'm lonely. So lonely. And grumpy. And gloomy. And morose. And suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder, Major Depression, and a trail-mix of many assorted psychiatric disorders such as OCD, paranoia, and bargain-basement low self-esteem sprinkled in....ya know, just for kicks. The internal storm was brewing....I knew I was headed for a major emotional melt-down and I could feel it hanging in the air along with the fluctuating barometric pressure. Sadly, I didn't disappoint myself.
I reheated some left-overs for dinner. The same meal I've had the last 2 nights.......when you've have bariatric surgery, you eat a LOT of left-overs.....one single meal seems to last for weeks. I'm sick of that chicken casserole, by the way. SICK.OF.IT. I never want to eat it again. It was really good the first time I ate it last week.....then it wasn't awful the second time, it was just okay last night, it was gross at lunch today.....and it was downright disgusting tonight. I didn't eat much of it before I flushed it down the garbage disposal in the sink and went foraging in the pantry for other foods. I didn't want anything "heavy".....and heck if I was going to go to the trouble to cook something for just me........so I decided to pop some popcorn in the microwave to eat while I browsed Pinterest and watched reruns of Big Bang Theory on TBS. So I did.
I'd eaten about a handful of the popcorn when I got choked on a kernel. It literally got lodged in my trachea so badly that I couldn't breathe. I tried to cough.....it came out as a desperate wheeze.....After a few attempts, I knew it had to go up or down.....else I was going to suffocate......so I coughed HARD. I coughed so hard....terribly hard......forcefully hard. At last, I dislodged the popcorn. But then I couldn't stop coughing....and then I coughed so hard I started gagging.....and then I coughed so hard I threw up......and when I coughed that hard, as I threw up....I simultaneously lost control of my bladder (Hey. I'm middle-aged woman who gave birth to a behemoth 10 pound baby boy 22 years ago,.....and the icing on the cake: I'd just taken my 3 water pills...so that pump was primed!! So don't judge me for my occasional stress incontinence! It happens.). So I jumped up from the couch......yes, my now vomit covered, urine soaked couch........and tried to run to the bathroom.....but I stepped on the end of my own sock, pulling off my sock and tripping myself.....causing me to fall onto the floor on my knee - giving me a carpet burn and a huge bruise to my knee-cap. I ended up in the floor - hysterically coughing and crying with one sock on, wet pants and a shirt full of popcorn vomit. What a FUN evening!!! I kept thinking....."This. This is how they will find my body!!!" and somehow, I found the will to pull myself up, limp to the bathroom, strip out of my disgusting clothing, shower myself, dry off, and re-dress in flannel pj's and a nice soft t-shirt and fuzzy warm socks. And I just needed to vent.......but I had no one here to complain to (except Sophie the Schnauzer....who listens, but it isn't quite as cathartic to tell her about it....she was there for the performance anyway).
I survived my ordeal......just a little worse for wear. My dog was very worried about me....she stood vigil while I was in the shower. I got the couched all sparkling clean and the carpet as well. The clothes are soaking and will be washed later tonight. All's well that ends well, I suppose. I'm just glad today is almost over. I don't want any more popcorn, that's for sure. I think I will just sit here a while........snuggle with my puppy dog......perhaps chance drinking a warm beverage once my tummy settles down.....and I will just go to bed early and hopefully get some sleep tonight. Steve will be home tomorrow night and my world will get exponentially better and brighter again. I was not made to eat popcorn alone. Too dangerous.
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
Sunday, February 2, 2014
Words of Wisdom
So.........I spent part of my rainy, gloomy afternoon looking up inspirational quotes to get myself out of a dark place....I don't even know how I slide from Happy-Happy to Depths of Despair faster than a heart-beat.....but it happened again today. That quickly and without warning......it was like slamming into an oncoming train at full-speed. Nothing happened to trigger the descent....nothing awful, nothing scary, worrisome, or tragic. I just feel depressed. Not just sad....... but overwhelmingly defeated, depressed, unworthy of love, ashamed of being me, self-loathing......and it is literally just like flipping a switch. Part of the mind-boggling and shameful aspect of the whole thing is.....I don't feel entitled to feel the way I feel. I have no good reason; there is no justification or provocation for the drastic mood swing. The only thing I can chalk it up to is the simple fact that the devil is a liar and he's not just whispering these lies into my ear, he's shouting them from a mountain top with a megaphone and a state-of-the-art karaoke system....along with a refrain that sounds a lot like "nanny-nanny-boo-boo" or the more conventional "nee-ner-nee-ner." I wouldn't be surprised to see my short-comings broadcast on the Mega-Tron during half time at the Super Bowl tonight (They do have half-times in football....this much I know! That's when the bands play!! Do they have Mega-Trons too? I honestly don't watch football; I was a band-mom....the only part of the game I ever cared about was half-time.......and I'm completely clueless about every other aspect of the sport). Anyway....in addition to being sad, I'm also easily distracted. Oh look! A Squirrel!
Any way............I decided that it was NOT okay for me to feel this way. I had to stop it. I have the power to call out a liar for the thieving thief he is and say ENOUGH. STOP IT. I am who God says I am....and He says that I'm an overcomer. He ways that I've already won. HE says that I'm precious to HIM and that I matter enough to die for. I had to spend a lot of time praying over these promises this afternoon and saying them out loud. Sometimes, I have a problem believing even God and what He says about me......and like so many, many times before.....I had to claim that verse, "Lord, I believe! HELP my UNBELIEF!" as my very own.
I read through so many verses and then I started browsing Pinterest to find some quotes that might speak some truth to my broken heart. Here is a sampling of what I found. I think I might even write some of them on some pretty paper and post them in my closet, in my office, in my car......heck! I might as well tattoo some of them on my forehead. I need reminding a LOT. Sometimes I can be very hard-headed.
"Everything you do is based on the choices you made. It is not your parents, your past relationships, your job, the economy, the weather, an argument, or your age that is to blame. You and only you are responsible for every decision you make. Period."
"Don't mix bad words with your bad mood. You'll have many opportunities to change a mood, but you'll never get the opportunity to replace the words you spoke."
"There are two primary choices in life: To accept conditions as they are or accept the responsibility for changing them."
"Be selective in your battles; sometimes peace is better than being right."
"They may forget what you said, they may forget what you did, but they will never forget how you made them feel."
"Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim."
"When something bad happens, you have three choices: You can either left it define you, left it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you."
"You are responsible for how you feel, no matter what someone does to you. Remember you are always in control of your thoughts, so choose to feel confident and adequate rather than angry and insecure."
"On particullary rough days when I am sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."
"It isn't what we say or think that defines us, but what we do."
"Be an encourager. The world has plenty of critics already."
"A moment of patience in a moment of anger can save many moments of regret."
"Every day may not be good - but there is good in every day."
"Our days are happier when we give people a bit of our heart, rather than a piece of our mind."
"Sometimes not saying anything is the bet answer. Silence can never be misquoted."
""It is not joy that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us joyful."
"Maturity begins when we're content to feel we are right about something without feeling the necessity to prove someone else wrong."
"We can do difficult things."
"The cure for anger is delay."
"Never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter."
"Courage does not always roar. Sometimes it's the quiet voice at the end of day that says, "Try again tomorrow."
"Blowing out someone else's candle does not make yours burn any brighter."
"Stars can't shine without darkness."
"Your life is a work of art; if you don't like what you see, paint over it."
"Jealousy comes from counting other's blessings instead of our own."
"What you allow is what will continue."
"You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine."
"Your mood should not dictate your manners."
"Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don't belong."
"Worrying doesn't stop the bad stuff from happening, but it does stop you from enjoying the good stuff."
"Know that taking a step backwards after taking a step forward is not a disaster; it's more like a cha-cha."
"Most people don't listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to respond."
"Anything that costs your integrity is too expensive. You can't afford it."
"Success isn't just about what you accomplish in your life; it's about what you inspire others to do."
"Before you judge someone else, stop and think about all that you have been forgiven."
"What we see depends mainly on what we look for."
"A relationship is like a house; when a lightbulb burns out, you don't run out and buy a new house. You simply fix the broken light bulb."
"It's not who you are that holds you back - it's who you think you aren't."
"Talking about our problems is our greatest addiction; break the habit. Talk about your joys instead!"
"I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself. For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstance, but by our disposition."
"No matter how you feel: Get up. Dress up. Show up. Never give up. "
"Never left a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved."
"A party without cake is just a meeting." - Julia Childs (I know that this is not deep philosophically speaking - but I just love Julia Childs.....and cake!) :)
"Just because you are angry, doesn't mean you have the right to be cruel."
"Today will never come again; be a blessing. Be a friend. Encourage someone. Take time to care. Let your words heal and not wound."
"One kind word can change someone's entire day."
"Strength doesn't reside in having never been broken - but in the courage to grown strong in the broken places."
"Shame says that because I am flawed, I am unacceptable. Grace says that though I am flawed, I am still cherished."
"Whatsoever things are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report; if there be any virtue or praise, think on these things."
"Your life is a result of the choices you make. If you don't like your life, it's time to start making better choices."
"Don't feel bad if people remember you only when they need something. Feel privileged that you are like a candle that comes to their mind when there is darkness."
"Even the darkest hour only has sixty minutes."
"Forgive them. Even if they are not sorry."
"Humility is not thinking less of yourself. It's thinking of yourself less."
"The grass is greener where you water it."
"Conflict cannot survive without participation."
"Every person has at least one secret that would break your heart."
"Be kind to everyone. Everyone is fighting a battle."
"Love, peace, joy, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control."
"When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the fire department usually uses water."
"You are responsible for how you act, no matter how you feel."
"An ugly personality destroys a pretty face."
"Those who are the hardest to love need it the most."
"It's better to light a candle then to curse the darkness."
"When you are happy, you enjoy the music. When you are sad, you understand the lyrics."
"Live like there's no midnight." - Cinderella
"You can tell more about a man by what he says about others than by what others say about him."
"Don't be pushed by your problems; be led by your dreams."
"The pursuit of excellence is gratifying and healthy. The pursuit of perfection is frustrating, neurotic, and a terrible waste of time."
"You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world and there is still going to be somebody who hates peaches."
"Comparison is the thief of joy."
"Storms make trees take deeper roots."
"Integrity means basing your decisions on personal values rather than personal gain."
"There are three choices: Give up, give in, or give it all you've got!"
"Motivation doesn't last. Neither does bathing. That's why we have to do it every day."
"Envy is an illusion. When something good happens to someone else, it takes nothing away from you."
"Write your troubles in the sand and carve your blessings in stone."
"There is more mercy in Christ than there is sin in me."
"Raise your words, not your voice; it's the rain that grows the flowers, not the thunder."
"Treat everyone with politeness, even when they are rude. Not because they are kind, but because you are."
"The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday."
"The reason we are so insecure is because we are comparing our blooper reel and behind-the-scenes footage with everyone else's highlights reel."
"Lighthouses don't go running all over an island looking for a boat to save; they stand still and shine."
"Most of the pain we deal with is only in our thoughts."
"Follow your heart, but take your brain with you."
"Some people look for a beautiful place. Others make a place beautiful."
"A river cuts through rock not by strength, but by persistence."
"The food I eat is either the most powerful medicine, or the slowest kind of poison. It's up to me."
"Your most effective ministry will come out of your deepest hurts."
"Exercise should be about rewarding your body with endorphins and strength; not about punishing it for what you have eaten."
"If you speak when you are angry, you will make the best speech you will ever regret."
"If you want to feel rich, count all you have that money can't buy."
"At the end of a day, focus not on what's tearing you apart, but what's holding you together."
"You are free to chose, but you are not free from the consequence of that choice."
"Don't change yourself so that people will like you. Be the real you and the right people will love you for who you are."
"Peace doesn't mean that you aren't in a hard place with no trouble; it means that you are in the midst of those things but still have a calm in your heart."
"Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate."
"Our backgrounds and experiences influence who are, but we are ultimately responsible for who we become."
"Don't believe everything you think."
"People aren't either wicked or noble; they are like chef salads with good things and bad things chopped up and mixed together in a vinaigrette of conflict and confusion."
"A bad attitude is like a flat tire; you can't go anywhere until you change it."
"Your beliefs don't make you a better person. Your behavior does."
"Fear is a liar."
"Sometimes you have to do what you don't like to get to where you need to be."
"You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one."
"Integrity is telling myself the truth; honesty is telling the truth to others."
"The bad news is that time flies. The good news is that you are the pilot."
"Life is a sequence of moments called "Now"."
"It's better to be a Proverbs 31 Woman than a Victoria Secret's Model."
"Don't let a bad day trick you into thinking you have a bad life."
"Be okay with where you are, even if you want to change it. You have to start somewhere."
"If you are not willing to learn, no one can help you; if you are determined to learn, no one can stop you."
"Don't try to hard to fit in; you were born to stand out."
"Stop wearing your wish bone where your back bone needs to be."
"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by the way he climbs a tree, he will spend his whole life believing that he is stupid."
"We can make ourselves miserable, or we can make ourselves strong; it's the same amount of work."
"The cause of most of man's misery is sacrificing what he wants most for what he wants now."
Well, it may not be the fount of all wisdom......but it did give my mind something to chew on for a while, and reading all these wise sayings (along with some earnest prayer) did pull me out of my Sunday afternoon blue funk. The truth is.......I really can't believe everything I think. I tend to think too much. Over think. And then I end up chasing my tail. So.....anyway. I think I will write some of these down as reminders for the darker days when Debbie Downer is my happier, more well-adjusted cousin and I'm beating my head against the concrete wall of manufactured and pretend discontent and disappointment.
Any way............I decided that it was NOT okay for me to feel this way. I had to stop it. I have the power to call out a liar for the thieving thief he is and say ENOUGH. STOP IT. I am who God says I am....and He says that I'm an overcomer. He ways that I've already won. HE says that I'm precious to HIM and that I matter enough to die for. I had to spend a lot of time praying over these promises this afternoon and saying them out loud. Sometimes, I have a problem believing even God and what He says about me......and like so many, many times before.....I had to claim that verse, "Lord, I believe! HELP my UNBELIEF!" as my very own.
I read through so many verses and then I started browsing Pinterest to find some quotes that might speak some truth to my broken heart. Here is a sampling of what I found. I think I might even write some of them on some pretty paper and post them in my closet, in my office, in my car......heck! I might as well tattoo some of them on my forehead. I need reminding a LOT. Sometimes I can be very hard-headed.
"Everything you do is based on the choices you made. It is not your parents, your past relationships, your job, the economy, the weather, an argument, or your age that is to blame. You and only you are responsible for every decision you make. Period."
"Don't mix bad words with your bad mood. You'll have many opportunities to change a mood, but you'll never get the opportunity to replace the words you spoke."
"There are two primary choices in life: To accept conditions as they are or accept the responsibility for changing them."
"Be selective in your battles; sometimes peace is better than being right."
"They may forget what you said, they may forget what you did, but they will never forget how you made them feel."
"Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim."
"When something bad happens, you have three choices: You can either left it define you, left it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you."
"You are responsible for how you feel, no matter what someone does to you. Remember you are always in control of your thoughts, so choose to feel confident and adequate rather than angry and insecure."
"On particullary rough days when I am sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."
"It isn't what we say or think that defines us, but what we do."
"Be an encourager. The world has plenty of critics already."
"A moment of patience in a moment of anger can save many moments of regret."
"Every day may not be good - but there is good in every day."
"Our days are happier when we give people a bit of our heart, rather than a piece of our mind."
"Sometimes not saying anything is the bet answer. Silence can never be misquoted."
""It is not joy that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us joyful."
"Maturity begins when we're content to feel we are right about something without feeling the necessity to prove someone else wrong."
"We can do difficult things."
"The cure for anger is delay."
"Never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter."
"Courage does not always roar. Sometimes it's the quiet voice at the end of day that says, "Try again tomorrow."
"Blowing out someone else's candle does not make yours burn any brighter."
"Stars can't shine without darkness."
"Your life is a work of art; if you don't like what you see, paint over it."
"Jealousy comes from counting other's blessings instead of our own."
"What you allow is what will continue."
"You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine."
"Your mood should not dictate your manners."
"Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don't belong."
"Worrying doesn't stop the bad stuff from happening, but it does stop you from enjoying the good stuff."
"Know that taking a step backwards after taking a step forward is not a disaster; it's more like a cha-cha."
"Most people don't listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to respond."
"Anything that costs your integrity is too expensive. You can't afford it."
"Success isn't just about what you accomplish in your life; it's about what you inspire others to do."
"Before you judge someone else, stop and think about all that you have been forgiven."
"What we see depends mainly on what we look for."
"A relationship is like a house; when a lightbulb burns out, you don't run out and buy a new house. You simply fix the broken light bulb."
"It's not who you are that holds you back - it's who you think you aren't."
"Talking about our problems is our greatest addiction; break the habit. Talk about your joys instead!"
"I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself. For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstance, but by our disposition."
"No matter how you feel: Get up. Dress up. Show up. Never give up. "
"Never left a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved."
"A party without cake is just a meeting." - Julia Childs (I know that this is not deep philosophically speaking - but I just love Julia Childs.....and cake!) :)
"Just because you are angry, doesn't mean you have the right to be cruel."
"Today will never come again; be a blessing. Be a friend. Encourage someone. Take time to care. Let your words heal and not wound."
"One kind word can change someone's entire day."
"Strength doesn't reside in having never been broken - but in the courage to grown strong in the broken places."
"Shame says that because I am flawed, I am unacceptable. Grace says that though I am flawed, I am still cherished."
"Whatsoever things are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report; if there be any virtue or praise, think on these things."
"Your life is a result of the choices you make. If you don't like your life, it's time to start making better choices."
"Don't feel bad if people remember you only when they need something. Feel privileged that you are like a candle that comes to their mind when there is darkness."
"Even the darkest hour only has sixty minutes."
"Forgive them. Even if they are not sorry."
"Humility is not thinking less of yourself. It's thinking of yourself less."
"The grass is greener where you water it."
"Conflict cannot survive without participation."
"Every person has at least one secret that would break your heart."
"Be kind to everyone. Everyone is fighting a battle."
"Love, peace, joy, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control."
"When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the fire department usually uses water."
"You are responsible for how you act, no matter how you feel."
"An ugly personality destroys a pretty face."
"Those who are the hardest to love need it the most."
"It's better to light a candle then to curse the darkness."
"When you are happy, you enjoy the music. When you are sad, you understand the lyrics."
"Live like there's no midnight." - Cinderella
"You can tell more about a man by what he says about others than by what others say about him."
"Don't be pushed by your problems; be led by your dreams."
"The pursuit of excellence is gratifying and healthy. The pursuit of perfection is frustrating, neurotic, and a terrible waste of time."
"You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world and there is still going to be somebody who hates peaches."
"Comparison is the thief of joy."
"Storms make trees take deeper roots."
"Integrity means basing your decisions on personal values rather than personal gain."
"There are three choices: Give up, give in, or give it all you've got!"
"Motivation doesn't last. Neither does bathing. That's why we have to do it every day."
"Envy is an illusion. When something good happens to someone else, it takes nothing away from you."
"Write your troubles in the sand and carve your blessings in stone."
"There is more mercy in Christ than there is sin in me."
"Raise your words, not your voice; it's the rain that grows the flowers, not the thunder."
"Treat everyone with politeness, even when they are rude. Not because they are kind, but because you are."
"The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday."
"The reason we are so insecure is because we are comparing our blooper reel and behind-the-scenes footage with everyone else's highlights reel."
"Lighthouses don't go running all over an island looking for a boat to save; they stand still and shine."
"Most of the pain we deal with is only in our thoughts."
"Follow your heart, but take your brain with you."
"Some people look for a beautiful place. Others make a place beautiful."
"A river cuts through rock not by strength, but by persistence."
"The food I eat is either the most powerful medicine, or the slowest kind of poison. It's up to me."
"Your most effective ministry will come out of your deepest hurts."
"Exercise should be about rewarding your body with endorphins and strength; not about punishing it for what you have eaten."
"If you speak when you are angry, you will make the best speech you will ever regret."
"If you want to feel rich, count all you have that money can't buy."
"At the end of a day, focus not on what's tearing you apart, but what's holding you together."
"You are free to chose, but you are not free from the consequence of that choice."
"Don't change yourself so that people will like you. Be the real you and the right people will love you for who you are."
"Peace doesn't mean that you aren't in a hard place with no trouble; it means that you are in the midst of those things but still have a calm in your heart."
"Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate."
"Our backgrounds and experiences influence who are, but we are ultimately responsible for who we become."
"Don't believe everything you think."
"People aren't either wicked or noble; they are like chef salads with good things and bad things chopped up and mixed together in a vinaigrette of conflict and confusion."
"A bad attitude is like a flat tire; you can't go anywhere until you change it."
"Your beliefs don't make you a better person. Your behavior does."
"Fear is a liar."
"Sometimes you have to do what you don't like to get to where you need to be."
"You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one."
"Integrity is telling myself the truth; honesty is telling the truth to others."
"The bad news is that time flies. The good news is that you are the pilot."
"Life is a sequence of moments called "Now"."
"It's better to be a Proverbs 31 Woman than a Victoria Secret's Model."
"Don't let a bad day trick you into thinking you have a bad life."
"Be okay with where you are, even if you want to change it. You have to start somewhere."
"If you are not willing to learn, no one can help you; if you are determined to learn, no one can stop you."
"Don't try to hard to fit in; you were born to stand out."
"Stop wearing your wish bone where your back bone needs to be."
"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by the way he climbs a tree, he will spend his whole life believing that he is stupid."
"We can make ourselves miserable, or we can make ourselves strong; it's the same amount of work."
"The cause of most of man's misery is sacrificing what he wants most for what he wants now."
Well, it may not be the fount of all wisdom......but it did give my mind something to chew on for a while, and reading all these wise sayings (along with some earnest prayer) did pull me out of my Sunday afternoon blue funk. The truth is.......I really can't believe everything I think. I tend to think too much. Over think. And then I end up chasing my tail. So.....anyway. I think I will write some of these down as reminders for the darker days when Debbie Downer is my happier, more well-adjusted cousin and I'm beating my head against the concrete wall of manufactured and pretend discontent and disappointment.
Groundhog Stew, anyone?
Well, today is officially Groundhog Day. And they say that Old Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow....so that means 6 more weeks of winter. Anybody else up for some Groundhog stew?
You know how in the movie, Groundhog Day, Bill Murray has to live through the same winter day about a gazillion times? Yeah. Feels a lot like actual winter to me. Every. Single. Day.......cold, cold, cold. The alarm rings and I have to climb out of my warm bed to face yet another cold day.
Winter is so difficult for me.....Oh, it's fine until after Christmas....winter-wonderland, snowmen, North Pole, Santa, sleigh-rides, jingle bells, dashing through the snow and what-not......and then, come January, I'm pretty much done with it. The next two-three months are essentially just miserable for me.
I don't like being cold; I don't like goosebumps, chilblains, chapped lips, dry skin, runny noses, static cling, dead brown grass, naked trees, frost bite, shivering, scraping frost off my windshield, the lack of manual dexterity while wearing gloves, stiff achy joints, sharp, arctic winds, wearing 10 layers of clothing, or slipping on ice. I don't like short, gloomy days that start off gray - only to fade to even more lonely darkness at the early hour of 4pm.
Our forecast for tonight includes a "winter weather warning": Sleet, Ice, and Snow. Or as I like to think of it: Ick, Blah, and YUCK.
I have spent a good portion of today in protest of winter; dreaming of warmth.....of sunny, springtime days with balmy breezes and soft green grass that I can run through with bare feet. I even switched my winter body wash out for an 'Aruba Coconut' scent that comes in a bright teal blue that is the exact color of the Caribbean sea. I'm listening to the Beach Boys and singing along with "Cocomo" and dreaming of palm trees swaying in the sunshine and the lazy summer time. I'm longing for the joy of digging in my garden dirt to plant flowers, herbs and vegetables! I'm craving hunks of red watermelon that dribbles sweet juice down my chin with each luscious bite. I am already planning picnic lunches alongside bubbling streams on rocks with soft mossy green carpets with a canopy of lush green leaves overhead to give shelter from the sunshine. I swear I can feel the wind of my face during motorcycle rides and feel my hair whip around in the turbulent wind as we drop the top on the convertible and speed along country roads......where we can hear the crickets and katy-dids chirping along the fence rows. I can almost hear the cheery tune of the icee-man's music-box, announcing the sale of his sweet, icy drinks from the back of his pick-up truck. I can feel the pure joy of gleefully splashing barefooted into a puddle after a summer afternoon thunderstorm and see the magical sight of a thousand twinkling lightening bugs dancing in the soft evening shadows, enticing me to come play hide and seek with them. Daylight lasting until after 9pm beckons me to linger outside....to pull a few weeds, walk around the neighborhood ,or just sit on the porch and relax with a glass of ice tea.
But........according to folk-lore, we have six more weeks of winter weather to look forward to. Six more weeks of flannel pajamas, hot soup for dinner, fuzzy socks, snuggling under quilts, frosty windows that look lace-covered, and wooly sweaters. Six more weeks of cozy nights, nested at home to keep warm. Six more weeks of possible snow-days. Six more weeks of hot-cocoa and hot tea; six more weeks of sitting by the fireplace; time to dream and plan for spring. Maybe it won't be too bad, after all.
Meanwhile......anybody have any good recipes for groundhog meatballs? I've heard it tastes just like chicken!
You know how in the movie, Groundhog Day, Bill Murray has to live through the same winter day about a gazillion times? Yeah. Feels a lot like actual winter to me. Every. Single. Day.......cold, cold, cold. The alarm rings and I have to climb out of my warm bed to face yet another cold day.
Winter is so difficult for me.....Oh, it's fine until after Christmas....winter-wonderland, snowmen, North Pole, Santa, sleigh-rides, jingle bells, dashing through the snow and what-not......and then, come January, I'm pretty much done with it. The next two-three months are essentially just miserable for me.
I don't like being cold; I don't like goosebumps, chilblains, chapped lips, dry skin, runny noses, static cling, dead brown grass, naked trees, frost bite, shivering, scraping frost off my windshield, the lack of manual dexterity while wearing gloves, stiff achy joints, sharp, arctic winds, wearing 10 layers of clothing, or slipping on ice. I don't like short, gloomy days that start off gray - only to fade to even more lonely darkness at the early hour of 4pm.
Our forecast for tonight includes a "winter weather warning": Sleet, Ice, and Snow. Or as I like to think of it: Ick, Blah, and YUCK.
I have spent a good portion of today in protest of winter; dreaming of warmth.....of sunny, springtime days with balmy breezes and soft green grass that I can run through with bare feet. I even switched my winter body wash out for an 'Aruba Coconut' scent that comes in a bright teal blue that is the exact color of the Caribbean sea. I'm listening to the Beach Boys and singing along with "Cocomo" and dreaming of palm trees swaying in the sunshine and the lazy summer time. I'm longing for the joy of digging in my garden dirt to plant flowers, herbs and vegetables! I'm craving hunks of red watermelon that dribbles sweet juice down my chin with each luscious bite. I am already planning picnic lunches alongside bubbling streams on rocks with soft mossy green carpets with a canopy of lush green leaves overhead to give shelter from the sunshine. I swear I can feel the wind of my face during motorcycle rides and feel my hair whip around in the turbulent wind as we drop the top on the convertible and speed along country roads......where we can hear the crickets and katy-dids chirping along the fence rows. I can almost hear the cheery tune of the icee-man's music-box, announcing the sale of his sweet, icy drinks from the back of his pick-up truck. I can feel the pure joy of gleefully splashing barefooted into a puddle after a summer afternoon thunderstorm and see the magical sight of a thousand twinkling lightening bugs dancing in the soft evening shadows, enticing me to come play hide and seek with them. Daylight lasting until after 9pm beckons me to linger outside....to pull a few weeds, walk around the neighborhood ,or just sit on the porch and relax with a glass of ice tea.
But........according to folk-lore, we have six more weeks of winter weather to look forward to. Six more weeks of flannel pajamas, hot soup for dinner, fuzzy socks, snuggling under quilts, frosty windows that look lace-covered, and wooly sweaters. Six more weeks of cozy nights, nested at home to keep warm. Six more weeks of possible snow-days. Six more weeks of hot-cocoa and hot tea; six more weeks of sitting by the fireplace; time to dream and plan for spring. Maybe it won't be too bad, after all.
Meanwhile......anybody have any good recipes for groundhog meatballs? I've heard it tastes just like chicken!
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